Archive for Relationships and Sex

Emotional Day Traders: Mental Health or Wealth?

Being a narcissist is very efficient. It’s like driving in a really streamlined and fast sports car with the windows closed. You whiz through the world at lightning speed – faster than anyone else – leaving them in your dust. And by keeping the windows closed you minimize drag and don’t have to feel the […]

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Falling in Love: Travel or Love?

I fell in love today. Such a good feeling. I forgot how good it feels. I am giddy, distracted, can’t eat, can’t sleep, glowing, keep smiling, dance spontaneously and am acting loopy. It feels so good. Who’s the lucky guy? Nope. Woman? Nope. It’s a trip. I am planning a trip. Several stars lined up […]

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A Quick and Dirty Guide to Success at Everything: Narcissism 101

You want to succeed? Quickly? Be a narcissist. I was glancing at my DSM the other day (the “Bible” (albeit flawed) of psychiatric diagnosis) and musing on Narcissistic Personality Disorder. As I reviewed the symptoms of the disorder, I rather sadly realized that it read more like a list of traits that all but guarantee […]

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Marry a parent?: Thoughts on Choosing a Spouse

Before you start thinking this is a treatise on laws against nature, or a statement on our Freudian tendency to marry mom – stop. I mean something quite different. Most of my friends have been married 10 plus years, several are ending their marriages, many have children. These divorces take place on a continuum from […]

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Love Party: Skip the Marriage, Have the Wedding

Let’s put it out there – if you haven’t figured it out yet, I am not a big fan of romantic love, marriage, or any of the ancillaries. So you can imagine my cynicism when celebrity couples who have been together a short time or very young celebs announce an engagement and impending nuptials. I […]

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The Game of Life: An Authentic Approach

Most of us played it as children. The game of Life – the one with the great spinny thing in the middle of the board. I played it yesterday with my daughter on the train – it is now available on the iTouch. As we played it dawned on me that the game of Life […]

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Moving On and Letting Go: A Path to Wellness

Letting go is a popular buzzword in modern psychobabble. Let it go – it’s applied to anger, weight, regret, loss, bitterness. This suggests that we can flip a switch and put down a burden as though it were a sack of potatoes. In the macro, this is not bad advice. These old wounds fester – […]

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Mothering 101: Parenting in a Modern Age

What does it mean to be a good mother? I struggled with that one today. So many of our performance indicators in this society are tangible and objective – dollars and cents, scores, grades. Sadly, this has devolved into how we judge so many non-quantifiable skills like mothering, marriage, friendship, and just plain life. I […]

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The Zen Date: The Impermanent Relationship

First and last date: Venice, CA. “I am going out to sea for 2 months tomorrow….” Color me happy – the most musical words a commitment-phobe like myself could have heard on a first and clearly last date. We met at a bar, he asked me out, we were quite different, and yet he was […]

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Informed Consent: Efficient Dating in a Modern Age

As a clinician and as a researcher we are required to use informed consent forms. You have filled them out before – every time you go to the doctor, sometimes even when you go for a massage. It is a cover your ass document that spells out your rights as a patient/client/consumer. The high points […]

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